As sure as there will be annoying Xmas decorations out weeks before the Big Day, there will be annoying roadblocks so don’t drink and drive, kids. We got some gig listings and some news in this column to keep you maniacs smashing and dashing through the December fog and rain.

The Astoria – 769 East Hastings St.

Fri. Dec. 20: Tribune, M16, Azodanum & God Said Kill

Funky’s a.k.a. Punky Thasherbalts – 37 W. Hastings St.

Fri. Dec. 13: Neil Burns Tribute w/ Dayglo Abortions, Car 87, Legion of Goons, The Fight United

Sat. Dec. 14: Diecember Fest #2 w/ Tyrants Blood, Life Aganst Death, Zuckuss, Abriosis, Dead Again, Memoria

Fri. Dec. 20: Subculture Xiii – Art & Music Show! All Art Under $50!!! Featuring The Strugglers, The Spree Killers, Old Derelicts, with artists such Rat Funk, Rot N Hell.

Sat. Dec. 21: Antichristmass Xii, Ancient Obliteration, Firecult, Shadows Beneath

Fri. Dec. 27: The Ultimate Clown Clad Iron Maiden Tribute, Powerclown, Road Rash,

Sat. Dec. 28: The Return of CUM SOC !!

Tues. Dec. 31:  Metal New Years Eve w/ Archspire, the Joint Chiefs, and tba.

The Vogue Theatre – 918 Granville St.

Wed. Dec. 4: Suicidal Tendencies – “The Slam City Fall Tour 2013”

The Rickshaw Theatre – 254 E. Hastings

Fri. Dec. 6: Church of Misery (Japan) Saviors, Baptists, Wizard Rifle $25

Fri. Dec. 13: DIECEMBER Fest w/ Archspire, Burning Ghats, Sinned, Anion, Nihilate, Ogroem, Dungeons, Nautilus $15

The Railway Club – 579 Dunsmuir

Sat. Dec. 14: Shockload’s record release with Blacked Out, Rad Disaster, Ellesmere.

Shockload are a trio of kindred spirits from Kenora and Antigonish who gathered here in Vancouver to create quite a tuneful pop punk racket with twists and turns a plenty. On Dec. 14 they will be releasing their debut full-length album “Attractive Distraction” at the Railway Club. The album was produced by Brian Else at Crappy Jack Studio and mastered by Stu McKillop at Rain City Recorders. Gtone had a few words for us about the album, “We are proud to be releasing this album on our own, something we have wanted for a long time.” We’ll be there.

FESTIVAL ALERT:  The 5th Annual DIECEMBER FEST: Two nights of crazy starting Fri. Dec. 13 @ the Rickshaw with Archspire, Burning Ghats, Sinned, Nihilate, Ogroem, Dungeons, Nautilus and ending Sat. Dec. 14 @ Punky Thrasherbalts a.k.a. Funky Winkerbeans with Tyrants Blood, Life Against Death, Zuckuss, Abriosis, Memorial, Destroy All, Witch Of The Waste. Tickets in advance for both shows is $20 – $15 for each show at the door. Buy your presale tickets

We talked to Ani Kyd because we heard she was up to something as usual. “A couple of weeks ago Jello Biafra and I were asked to be in a parody trailer of the Hunger Games called The Hipster Games…” It’s pretty funny and you can watch below: The Hipster Games: Blowing Smoke – Hunger Games Catching Fire Parody.

What else is new with the queen of the scene? “I have a new digital release coming out on Alternative Tentacles in January… very different sound for me… super mellow!!”

Send band news for the new year to Believe me, it’s worth it. It’s in print and online.

Compiled by Rene Milord and Tanya Van

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